Sunday, November 14, 2010
Don't Stop The Music. Just Kidding. You Made My Ears Bleed.
"What do you mean they can't fix the pitch when I sing live?"
If you can't sing, there are quite a few technological advances in the music industry to make you sound like a true star. Singing live isn't one of them.
Let's face it, 'tuning up' only gets you so far. Once you hit the live stage, there are no magical vocal fairies to tweak your performance. Short of slipping invisible earmuffs on every audience member or pulling an Ashlee Simpson, your secret is gonna come out. No amount of eye blinding costumes or off beat drunk stage dancing can make up for your off key ballad.
The only thing that rang true to the song was the line, "they've told me to stop singing." Yes, yes they did, but sadly you didn't listen.
Next time you contemplate embracing the world through a live venue as greatly viewed as SNL, don't.
Oh...80's dance streamers! I'm suddenly distracted and you now sound like an angelic choir decided to frolic on my eardrum.